Hopelessly devoted to you

https://youtu.be/I9n98kWuqqc

Joshua Jet Vaughan and The Voice of God

https://youtu.be/lvlPXkDB2Og

About my Joshua part 1

Over the next few weeks I would like to post a few things about My husband. This man would be the one person on the planet I could honestly say I admire even if my admiration weren't biased by the amazement that he would choose me to share his life with.

Whenever I see My husband I'm reminded of the first moment I saw him. He was sitting alone at a table inn a bar we both went to for karaoke. My gaze kept going to him because, while he was smiling, his eyes showed a deep knowledge that I couldn't figure out what it meant. It drew me in and I had to find out.

The first time I heard him sing; I felt as though all music I had heard before was now dead to me because nothing could compare to the power, the spine chilling rasp, the lyrical flow of the sounds coming from his mouth. It was the most beautiful voice that I have ever heard. A voice that makes you believe in angels, because they have to exist to be listening to this magnificence.  A voice that makes you fall in love. 

Newer not better part two

Okay, so companies are constantly looking for ways to invent themselves. Constantly changing products to stay relevant. People do this too. But when does it go to far?


When someone's life is in your hands.
We've talked before any the corruption of the medical community in different parts of the country, and sadly it happens regardless of income, stature or position, but happens more commonly with the poor. I've heard several stories of patients going into emergency rooms and being turned away for having a public insurance such as Medicaid or Medicare (and though this is illegal) many don't know their rights or are not in a position to have them enforced.


so when your loved one or yourself is undergoing treatment and it is working why do doctors go and change it. My husband recently was undergoing treatment and finally had a few of his symptoms managed and the doctor changed his regimen. No explanation, on fact we didn't even see him first. Didn't even find out until the nurse came in to administer the new treatment (my husband being in the hospital preparing for surgery) we were outraged. I immediately called our lawyer and the hospital liason, and we got it worked out, but not everyone has these resources available. The doctor had argued that this treatment is new and is supposed to be better for patients, fewer side effects, etc. But how many times have you seen those pharmaceutical commercials with an outrageous list of side effects, miraculous claims, and almost all last death as a side effect. This is not the point I originally wanted to make, but here it is. Know your rights, with doctors especially and remember that you can consult with a lawyer for free. So grab a phone book and if you don't find your answers from the first one, call another. Second, if legal means will not help you, remember that we live in an age of media. Call your local news stations, call your local papers. Ask who you can talk to to report a story on corruption and if no one listens keep calling.

Newer, not better

It doesn't occur as often any longer, but just ten years ago it seemed as if you couldn't pass a day without hearing the phrase "new and improved." But why do companies do this? Constantly coke out with something new? Although I do see the point of it, why don't you keep the old products? I've seen this so many times.


With nutritional supplements. For example, when I first met my husband I got on this fat burner kick. Not to help me lose weight, with his training I was shedding the pounds fast enough on my own, but to help me get off my caffeine addiction problem. (over 40 cups a day plus several energy drinks) When I tried to do these cold turkey it simply didn't go well. So I started taking Hydroxycut Elite. Amazing ! No jitters. Clean energy. Actually improved my mood. No crash. I felt good. That in addition to eating right, working out, working towards my dreams in music, and most importantly my hunky gorgeous eye candy of a man (and all those great personality traits too, but what can I say my husband is a stud and I never thought I'd be with a stud. I used to tell him he was my best accessory ever, but that his looks were just a nice bonus on top of everything he is that I could ever hope for in a man)
I'm going to segue for a moment because now i want to share a story. Joshua used to watch all the guilty pleasure movies i wanted to see. Heck, one of our first dates was hoping to see the movie 9 which is funny because this was before he told me he despises animated films. (btw i loved it, recommend it, but especially if you have a gorgeous man to hold your hand through it) but we were at home shortly after we moved in together and ere watching one of the twilight movies, when a thought I'd had for a while and hinted to him ("did you know you're every girls dream man?" " you could be a romance novel hero") we were sitting in the couch watching Twilight when he looked at me and exclaimed "holy shit I'm Edward!" I laughed so hard that i literally fell off the couch. Which led to non-PG reassurances that he was so much better.


back to hydroxy cut. So 6 months after i discovered this amazing product, they stopped making it. No warning, no "we're phasing this product out so stock up while you can, just one day you couldn't order it any longer. And i was pissed. Even more so when i tried their new "black" and then "pro" which suck! Made me feel sick, jittery, couldn't relax, couldn't work out it made me so sick. Made me depressed. Ugh! And the crash... Good night.
Why?! Why get rid of a product that was so successful? Hell it said right on the bottle over 1 million bottles sold! If you sold a million of anything why would you get rid of it?


my point is beyond these pretty problems, I'll continue in the next post. But please share with me your newer Is NOT better anecdote.


til we meet again
Anna Bella Vaughan

About Joshua

I met my husband 7 years ago in Alden at karaoke, and we were married soon after. From the moment of meeting we knew that we wanted to spend the rest of our life together and that God had created us for one another. My husband is enormously talented; (in so many ways) especially gifted in music. Being a musician myself, it was easy for us to envision a life and careers together. My husband has lost more than just his health from this sickness; he has lost much, and in some cases all, of his ability to use the God given gifts and talents that he has, such as singing. The information, knowledge, and wisdom of how is all in his head, but the effects and consequential symptoms of his illness, especially the brain tumor, does not physically allow him to do so. In every way he is a prisoner within his own body. Though some doctors in the past have given him prognoses of a month or less to live, his strength to fight had kept him going and his hope that he will get the help he needs pushes him to stay alive and to still find strength and energy to love and guide me; consistently being my strength as well.

Laughter is the Best Medicine

I don't personally subscribe to this common cliche that Laughter is the best medicine. I'm sure that most cancer patients, like my husband, will tell you that while laughter is great, and joy is better, that laughter can hurt more than the good feeling that it is brought on by. Despite that fact, my husband still finds time and energy to bring me joy and laughter each and everyday, when I never truly felt the need or inspiration to do so before I met him. He is truly a gift, one that I would like to share with you now. Take Care GSET family.

 Anna Bella Vaughan

New album-Coming Soon

So excited for my husband's new album to be released soon.  We've been talking of it for a while and with his health problems it has been a long difficult journey to finish.  I am so proud of him and I know that no one has ever put as much heart and soul, much less physical effort, into a world changing album.

I haven't talked extensively in detail about my husband's talent, mostly for selfish reasons, because it is difficult to see him going through this battle and fight with cancer each day and think about just how much he is fighting for, not to mention the part that I've had to play not only in helping him, but in a lot of times hindering him (most married couples will know what I mean.)  But truly I have never known, as a musician, any one with the musical talent that he has (amongst the many other gifts and talents he possesses.)

*Spoiler Alert* But this is a good one.  Our band's upcoming album (and I always refer to it as my husband's album because truly he is a one of a kind talent) is going to be world changing, and as our record company's focus, #BringRealMusicBack.

The first time Joshua ever played the guitar for me, I just sat there awestruck with my eyes closed.  He actually asked me if he was boring me.  But the sounds that he creates with the guitar are so melodic, yet powerful, rich and yet delicate, transcends anything I had ever heard before, and took me to an almost utopia of musical peace.  It's as though your entire life, you have (musically and otherwise) been searching for something in the boom boom of club music, the twang of country, the auto tuning of pop, to speak to your soul, but never find it.  And in his guitar I found that missing element to my soul, that speaks to my inner musician and music lover, and is the perfect blend of contemporary, classical, and genre yet to be named because we have never had music such as this before.

I'm blessed to be one of the few people that have heard my husband sing.  And his voice, well, it's like real hot cocoa. Not Swiss Miss, or Nestle, it's like the kind that you would get at a small mom and pop shop in Italy.  Rich, Creamy, Frothy, Smooth, that lingers over every taste bud, and sends your senses to a height that you never imagined before, and long after it is done, lingers as though it will remain a piece of you.  That is what my husband's voice is like.  Often times when he is just speaking, especially when he's telling me one of his childhood stories, my heart is warmed and the combination of his soothing voice and the joy of hearing of the good points in his childhood, makes me sleepy, that warm wrapped in a cozy blanket next to a fire on a cold winter's night sleepy.

An angel my husband's is, and the true 7th son of the 7th son.  I am grateful and blessed to have been a part of this project (our album) and excited for the world to finally hear the life changing, scratch that, soul changing experience that my husband's music will create.  This is a true collaboration or heart, mind, soul, sweat, tears, life, death, triumph in each melody line and each note uttered from my husband's lips, will allow you to find, musically (and hopefully spiritually and generally) the peace that you have been seeking.

I was in the studio yesterday, listening to a couple of the tracks again, while my husband was off probably buying another house for the homeless, or saving a baby from a burning building (he is truly my Superman) but I turned off the lights and just listened for a couple hours.  And all of the stress, of his health struggles, the responsibility of our life and our purpose and dreams to help others, everything else melted away.  Because that's what a true voice, true guitar, true real music can do.  Everyone can tell, can feel when a song is auto tuned, produced to nonrecognition, digitized to the point where there are no true musicians, no musical instruments beyond a computer keyboard, on tour with artists today.  That longing, that need will soon be filled. Be prepared to have your heart melt, your soul heal, and your ears be grateful.

Take Care GSET Family.

Anna Bella Vaughan

Real Life Angel- The Atheist Converted

I wanted to share an anecdote because, while Joshua's story is filled with tragedy, our story is also filled with these moments where I stood back and just observed him in awe and wonder at the way that he acted towards others, and the way that others flocked towards him unbeknownst to themselves.  He has this way of magnetically bringing people to him, and I know it's because of his heart and kindness, and the purity of his affection towards strangers that allows people who have never known him to gravitate to listen to his words.




Be not forgetful to entertain strangers: for thereby some have entertained angels unawares. Hebrews 13:2
Maybe people walk through life wonderful if they have ever encountered an angel. I, however, lie blessed as one of the few who has and knows it.

When I first met my husband, I was drawn to his eyes. Not just because they are beautiful, but also because beneath them I could see a depth and pain that I knew only I could see. While he was smiling at me, I could see that the smile was only on the surface of his soul, while a deep trial and journey laid within.

As a child, and I say a child because at 20 years old and having been through no true life experience, that is what I was, I wanted to hug away the pain in his eyes.  But of course, that is not what you do, walk up to someone you don't know and hug them, but all the same that is what my heart desired. 

As our meeting, and the beginning of our romance and love took off, I was seeing more and more of this amazing man who had fallen into my life and into my heart.

One night we went out to dinner and then landed at a casino.  Several people that I had went to high school with were there when we arrived.  One of which was known as The Atheist while I was in high school. He was known for being so fervently opposed to any ideal of a deity existing that everyone just called him The Atheist.  We began talking with him, about everything and anything.  After a while, I had to leave to find a restroom. 

 I was gone for perhaps 10 minutes and as I was approaching them I heard my Joshua and The Atheist speaking about God.  I cringed inwardly, until I got upon them and heard no sarcasm, no deep rooted hatred in The Atheist's voice, I heard only awe and wonder at the words that Joshua was speaking.  To say that I had shock running through my system would be an understatement. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. I would have been less surprised to have come back to find Joshua speaking with Jesus Christ Himself, than to hear a conversation with The Atheist about God that wasn't filled with anything but condescension.  

When the shock finally wore off and I began to actually hear what they were saying, I heard The Atheist talking about how when he was younger he believed and then upon seeing more of life he began to lose his faith because of the trials he had been through in his life and how he had always been alone. My Joshua listened and showed a level of compassion that I had always longed to possess, but had never even seen before.  You could see the care and the love in his heart and soul for this man that he had never met written across his face. I could feel it and it made my heart swell and made me love him even more, which I had not thought was possible.  Even now as I write about the memory of it, it brings a tear to my eye just thinking about the love that he poured out to a stranger over the trials that he had been through, even though my Joshua's life has been filled with such a level of suffering that is beyond even my comprehension; he loves everyone and relates to everyone and empathizes with each and every person he comes across.  

From the moment I met Joshua he's always had this pure concern for everyone and everything around him.  He gives love more freely than... I can't even now compare it to anything because it is so beyond words.  It is truly something you must see and experience yourself in order to understand.  It is more beautiful than the most beautiful sunrise.  

The Atheist could feel the genuine love coming from Joshua.  I have no doubt in my mind that this is what led The Atheist to turn to God that night.  He accepted Jesus Christ as his Savior, and God as his Father.  The Atheist was no more, he was simply Aaron for possibly the first time in years.  A burden had been lifted off his shoulders so heavy that he even stood taller, his face was lighter and looked younger, his actual age.  

This is only one instance of many where I saw my husband reach out with soul and spirit into the hearts, minds and souls of the people around them and heal something that we, as humans, can not see.  But he does... I may not know where these people are at this moment, but I do know one thing: that their lives are better for having had Joshua in it.  My life is better with Joshua in it.  



~Anna Bella Vaughan

Follow Your Passion Part One

As a performer of any kind, one of the first things you learn is to never apologize for mistakes before your performance.

As a musician, I've seen many of my fellows make this same mistake.  Even I have been guilty of it from time to time. One person I've never seen make a mistake is my husband Joshua. Not to say that he doesn't dislike what he plays at times, but something that I've observed about his playing (and see him apply to his and our life) is that if something doesn't go quite the way it was planned, to make it be the way you want.

Let me elaborate.  When I first started playing, I knew I had a passion for music.  One of my greatest fears growing up was that pursuing music in college, as a career, etc would take it from being a passion and a pleasure to being just a job and take the love that I feel for it out.  However, my husband has shown me that this is simply not the case and not only showed me that passion can exist pursuing music as a career, but also rekindled the fire inside of me for my music that I had given up on and let go out.

When I started out playing and singing, I was very insecure, but I had been taught not to apologize for the mistakes in my music (as so many musicians do).  I remember my first solo recital, and for some reason I had gotten it in my head that since I was "headlining" (if you can consider it that for a classical recital) to bow in between each song that I played.  As a classical pianist, typically you bow when you're done and that's it.  However, even while playing Kinderszenen (Scenes from Childhood) which consists of 13 short pieces, each about a minute a piece, I stood at the edge of the piano after each part and bowed.  I look back now in hindsight, and feel foolish for how I must have looked, especially since the majority of the people I was playing for I knew, and had known me since very young, though I was only 15 at the time of the recital, but to be that formal and that, pompous is the way I see myself at that time, to bow and require those that had supported my music in youth to applaud me every  two minutes seems quite absurd.

When I first met my husband, he told me stories of when he got his start. He would regale me with tales of his first tours, his first major concerts, what it was like to play before 1.4 million people.  It would blow my mind, and honestly used to cause fear in me of whether or not I had the chops to play with him, which is truly my dream (the fear of which is gone, and replaced with nerves and good anxiety, anxious to debut our album and band to the world thanks to my husband's encouragement and teaching.)

  He would also tell me about the common mistakes that musicians would often make when reaching out to record companies.  Joshua taught me that most A/R reps would take offense if you sent them in a recording, apologizing for crummy equipment or production value, because they have the experience to be able to tell the difference, apologizing or pointing it out, not only can seem unprofessional, but offensive to the reps implying that they can not tell the difference (though obviously my husband put this less abrasively and more articulately than I just did.)  But I understood his point.  Not apologizing for what you are lacking in (as far as your art is concerned) is crucial to being a professional performer: whether it be a lack of proper equipment, a lack of professional production, etc.

However...

Looking back and acknowledging those mistakes is key to growth; not just in your music but in life.

When I first met my husband I believed in the mantra, Make mistakes not regrets.  But now I look back on that belief and see it as foolish.  If you have no regrets, no true regrets, then how are you going to learn from the mistakes that you have made?   The truth lies in not letting it rule your life and stop you from moving forward.  My husband always says, You must confront your past because it is always gaining on you.  And when he first said this to me I had laughed a little bit, imagining my past literally running up behind me as a phantom.  However, it is a wonderful turn of phrase.  Because our past is constant and present.  It is our future we have to strive towards.  Even as I type these words, they are now in the past.

I have a lifetime to go to gain the wisdom that my husband has about life.  I would need a thousand lifetimes to be frank, but I hope to catch up to him at least to do him justice musically.

My husband is what you would call a prodigy.  He picked up the guitar in 6 weeks. Not to say that he didn't put in his hard work, he did.  Practicing 6 hours a day or more.  Every day without failure.  When you see my husband play, the guitar is literally an extension of himself.  A way to share a piece of his soul.  I've never seen or heard someone let the music flow out of them the way it does my Joshua.

But I wasn't writing this to simply brag up my husband, though it is one of my favorite past times (and I think it's only bragging if the talent isn't there to back up the claims, and in this case it is in spades.)  My husband is constantly looking back at his past work and critiquing it.  He listens back to his current playing and critiques it.  He is constantly looking at himself and his work and thinking, pushing and working to make improvements.

As an artist, I believe this is one of the greatest gifts you can have.  There is a reason it is called practicing art.  Because there is no perfection in art.  If you believe you have reached perfection, than there is no more you can do, nothing more for you to create.  Nothing more for you to change.

My husband just tweeted about music changing the world.  We don't have musicians that strive for this any longer.  Musicians used to push to share their passion, their love with the entire world for music is the universal language.  It can reach all corners of the earth and no matter what language it is in, with great music you can understand exactly what is the meaning.  Music isn't like this today (and of course, we will be changing that and bringing real music back through our own and by finding others through our record company GTRecords. #Shamelessplug)

I've posted several of my husband's old songs, and new recordings (secretly recorded via my phone) on Youtube.  And while some of his older work he makes clear that he doesn't favor, he also knows that once our new album is released that people will be able to hear the remarkable difference between his performance then and now.  Although his older work is still better than anything out today, his advancement after years of working hard and pursuing improvements on his playing, his voice, and his sound is remarkably apparent and truly a life and soul changing experience to listen to him.  I am truly blessed to be one of the few who have heard the angelic nature of his voice (and by angelic I mean the power and the rasp that one would imagine would have invoked a Fear Not in the bible, not the little naked babies with wings.)

But he agreed to allow me to keep his older works out there, not just because we used some of his older works for a great purpose (#BeRobin #HelpTheHomeless) But because he knew that it would be a great lesson to up and coming artists who want to pursue music.

We see these kids today on television shows such as American Idol, The Voice, etc and they are all in their teens crying because this is their last chance, and they've spent their whole life dreaming of being a singer.  At 13 years old, after singing for only a year or two, how can you believe that one audition is the beginning and end of your dreams?  If so, then how will you stay strong in the cut throat music industry if you do make it?

My husband put in a lot of time, and a lot of work to make his career and to perfect his sound, (and while I may sound as though I am contradicting a previous statement I'll elaborate.)  My husband's sound is flawless.  It transcends any sound I have ever heard come from an electric guitar.  It is raw.  It is crisp.  It is gritty and dirty.  It is clean.  It is beautiful. It is nasty.  He can even make his feedback be in tune with the song he is playing (as you can see in the below playlist in his original instrumental Hazy Days)





to be continued....

In The Words of Anna Bella- Family Values (family redefined?) Part two

I was watching Bizarre Foods with Andrew Zimmerman.  I like to watch that show when my husband is taking a nap because he hates it.  I find weird foods fascinating, while he finds the prospect of eating a sheep's brain gross. And while I would never try brain because I too find it disgusting, watching other people eat them is educational to me.  (Which is strange because my husband has a taste for the strangest things, if it is considered an acquired taste; chances are he loves it. He's my perfect enigma in that way)

Something I've noticed about all of the countries I see on television, and the ones that I have been blessed to visit, that differs from America is that they eat together.  In fact, in many countries, restaurants are set up, almost cafeteria style, so that you are eating at a communal table with others.

There's an old saying that goes: the family that eats together stays together.  And how much of this is true?  My husband and I both dream of the day that we can once again enjoy a meal, at meal time, at a table, and just enjoy the food and one another's company, as that is something we have not been able to do because of his health in years.  Its very hard on him, but also it's hard on me.  The home I grew up in, we had scheduled meals when I was a child, but as I grew older, by the time I reached 10 it was basically grab and go.  And even though I did not like my parents, there was something nice about the routine, and provided a stability and comfort that I didn't receive emotionally directly from them, but in this act.  And when it had gone, what little familial bond there had been in my family went with it.  It is a blessing that I'm not sure many people even realize is there to be appreciated.

I watch Stouffer's commercials, and several others, where they reference that kids are so attached to their phones that they don't even bother to look up.



It does seem as if we have lost all sense of family values.


to be continued...

In The Words of Anna Bella- Family Values Part One

With the coming of each political campaign always comes talk about the depreciation of family values in America.  But this post is not about politics, however, each and every day makes me wonder if there isn't something to this.


As many of you know, my husband, the founder of this organization and vision, has several severe health problems. For years we had lived under the understanding that his family knew about his health problems and simply did not care to lend their support and love.  Recently we found out that his family didn't know about his health problems or the severity, however, the sad fact remains that they do not care.

When I found out that my husband's family did not know about his health problems I started reaching out to them, both immediate and extended, and let everyone know how severe his health has become.  Everyone had shock, and everyone had their opinion, but not one person offered well wishes, good luck, or even compassion for our situation, instead, they wanted to take that opportunity to tell me about the problems in their life.

I find it amazing that these people felt the desire to share petty problems (compared to life and death) with a stranger (as most of his family I have never even spoken to) directly after being told that their cousin, nephew, uncle, brother, son, grandson, may be facing death.


I'd like to share an anecdote:

I called my husband's aunt.  And after telling her about how serious my husband's health problems have gotten proceeded to tell me about how  she understands what we are going through because her neighbor had a brain tumor and he died.  Seriously?!? What kind of thing is that to say?

Another story.  My husband is currently in the hospital awaiting surgery, again, many of you reading this know this already, and his immediate family had told us previously that they wanted to talk to him and possibly come see him before his surgery (as with any surgery, but especially one this intensive comes with risks of it's own) but I called the to let the know.  My husband wanted to speak with his sister, and upon calling her, she began screaming at him.  It as so loud, that though the phone was not on speaker, a nurse had come in the room asking us if we could turn the volume down because it was disturbing other patients, however the volume on the phone was as low as it could go, his sister was simply screaming that loudly.   She told him that my husband being sick had caused hell to come down on her and her family and that he had destroyed them and was tearing the apart and that she didn't want to be a part of it any longer.  (On a side note, we have seen or spoken to my sister-in-law and her family for a combined 4 hours in 7 years.)

I don't understand this behavior, and it tears me apart because, though my husband subscribes to the idea that family is not defined by blood but by those who love you unconditionally and that you love back, I find that I still subscribe, at times, to the childish notion that certain people in life are supposed to act a certain way, and am still shocked and appalled when they don't.  Family is not supposed to tell you that you are worthless, especially when you are facing death.  Family is not supposed to scream at you at a pitch and volume a dog couldn't hear.  Family support each other, they come together and love each other through hard times, they don't condemn you and tear you down.

I always felt as though my husband's family saw him getting sick and saw their meal ticket going away.  Frankly, I feel as though they are a bunch of freeloaders.  Looking to my husband's success to pave their way in life, and they hate him for getting sick and putting a hold on the cash flow because his, and now our, money had to go towards providing for us and his health care.  The first time I met my sister-in-law the first thing I heard out of her mouth regarding my husband (after she spent an hour talking about herself) was that he had to get healthy so he could buy her her dream house.  Not so he could have his health, not so that he could be happy and fulfill his dreams and goals, but so that he could buy her a house.  This coming from a woman who hasn't worked for 20 years and wonders why they don't have more money.  Another family member told my husband wouldn't it be better for everyone if he were dead because then they'd all be millionaires.  WHAT?  And how?  I have suspected for years that they have a life insurance policy out on him and are trying to cause his death so they can collect, but this isn't just unfounded paranoia, this was based upon the fact that I was told by his parents that I should take a life insurance policy out on him like they did... just in case.

NO. I'm not going to take a life insurance policy out on my husband because that would be considering the possibility that he will die.  I was disgusted with my own parents when I found out that they had taken a policy out on me when I was 5.  FIVE.  And the one my parents took out on me didn't include coverage for health problems or accidents. So basically short of someone kidnapping and murdering me, they wouldn't collect, which is why all of those thoughts I had as a child that my parents had malicious intentions for me; well, I don't feel crazy for thinking that way any longer.

Is this the result of some social statement about family morals falling apart?  I don't know.  But I know that 60 year old adults are acting like the 20 year olds we see on reality tv shows.  I know that the more people talk online, the less they interact with people in the real world.  I know that the more we accept, encourage, and support atrocities like the recent VMAs, the more people think that that's the way the world is and that it's the way they need to act to be accepted and successful, at least in the worldly sense.

To be continued....

Just my Thoughts- Gay marriage

At The Greatest Stories Ever Told we live by love.  No matter what our political, religious views or otherwise are, we believe that everybody deserves love, and that's the only way that we are going to change the world.

Here's my thoughts, though, on the recent Gay Marriage passage.

First, no matter what my personal views are on same sex-marriage, the fact is the that it was inevitable that it was going to pass.  Not only that, but as a heterosexual, happily, blissfully married woman, it will never personally effect me.  Heck, even straight couples say it's only a piece of paper, so is it really speaking to moral ambiguity that we allow same sex marriage?

Second, and my husband and I have discussed this before, what if you removed anything sexual from the equation.  I know it was meant to be a comedy, but look at that Adam Sandler movie I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry.  I never actually saw the movie, but the premise has to apply to several instances.  How many heterosexual couples get married out of convenience, especially today in a failing economy.  If you have two best friends who have been there for each other, let's say both widows or widowers, and they want to make sure that their best friend is taken care of financially or otherwise after they pass, without the money to have a proper will written up any family member could contest an inheritance after passing and moreso, you can not leave financial retirement packages, such as a 401k or pension package to a loved one outside of a spouse.  So it just disappears when you die.  This way two men or women could get married, with sex completely inconsequential to their relationship, and know that the other will be taken care of.

Thirdly, if we are going to allow equal rights as far as same sex marriage applies, then we have to also acknowledge and protect the rights of those who don't believe in it, whether it be politically or religiously, we all have the right in the United States of America to believe and stand convicted in our faith, regardless of what it is for.  If a bakery doesn't want to make a wedding cake for a same sex marriage, it is not grounds to sue them.  Guess what! They can refuse to make a pornographic cake for heterosexual bachelor party too! Go to a different bakery.  That's what makes America great, there's always another place to go to near by if it involves a high amount of junk food. I bet there are four more right on the same street!  And to drag someone's name through the dirt just because they refuse service, no one would make a homosexual stand in a picket line to oppose gay marriage, it would be ludicrous and seen as tormentous.  The same thing as churchs.  Ministers, priests, etc should not be facing potential civil suits because they refuse to perform the ceremony.  My question is, why do you care if they don't want to perform it.  In fact, You shouldn't want them to if they are  opposed to it.  Your wedding day, male/female, gay/straight, should be all about the love that you share with the person you are marrying.  In my opinion if you and your to be spouse is getting all up in arms about something so trivial, then you shouldn't be getting married in the first place if you are allowing the focus of your wedding day to drift from the love you share to a petty fight with someone who simply disagrees with you.  That is the beauty of America.  We don't have to agree with each other.

As far as politicians go, their job is to protect and support the rights of the people they represent.  That is why we vote them into their various offices.  As such, their religious and personal views on a topic such as gay marriage should not come into play.  For instance Mike Huckabee.  I'm sorry Mike, but if you want to preach, then find a pulpit not a political platform.  Your job is not to represent God in this way, but to represent the people's interest.  And being overweight and out of shape, you can not claim to be living righteously by God.  Especially when you have no financial problems to prevent you from eating right.  (A topic I would love to discus further another time.) God says to treat your body as a temple dedicated to him.  Well, even from the Christian standpoint, if you believe that homosexuality is a sin, you don't have the right to judge if you are not living perfectly.  My husband pointed out the other day a perfect example.  Whatever happened to What Would Jesus Do?  Do you think that Jesus would be out in the streets stoning homosexual couples as they exit a courthouse or church after their wedding? Or do you think he'd be drawing a line the sand for the picketers and saying if anyone of you have not sinned let you cast the first stone?

Basically what I'm saying is this. Republican, Democrat, Christian, Muslim, Buddhist, Gay, Straight, it doesn't matter. The only way we will have peace in America is to agree to disagree.  That's what our founding father's built this country on.  Everyone having a say and everyone having rights.  We've had our moments where we've delved into keeping those rights from others, but if we agree to disagree and stop being so sensitive, then everyone would get along fine.  The constitution was written to give everyone rights and the pursuit of happiness... but most people don't read the whole thing.  The pursuit of happiness as long as it doesn't deny someone else their rights.  (Obviously I'm paraphrasing) but an extreme example would be murder.  You don't have a right to murder someone because it makes you happy because that would be taking away their rights.  Well, in this case it is the same.  You have the rights as a homosexual couple to get married, but you don't have the right to attack someone who doesn't approve of it and force them to make your wedding cake.  Problem solved. Go to a bakery that does support same sex marriage, or that doesn't care either way.  That's two thirds of the options in your favor.

All I'm saying is once you have what you have been fighting for, stop looking for a fight.  Same-sex marriage was inevitable.  As one friend put it, can we just call it marriage now?  And as a comedian said Just because gay marriage is legal doesn't make it mandatory.  Let's get off our high horses and leave each other alone.  Let's choose to love one another, no matter what our differences or disagreements are, because we are all human beings with hearts, minds, bodies, and spirits that need caring for.  Let's overlook each other's misgivings and heal instead of hurt, no matter what the problem is.  And let's look at ourselves before we begin to judge someone else.

~Anna Bella Vaughan~